"Fool me — You can't get fooled again."

The title for this post is from Bush's infamous speech where he says,

There's an old saying in Tennessee — I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can't get fooled again.

--President George W. Bush, Nashville, Tenn., Sept. 17, 2002

Well, this phrase comes to mind when I think of how James and I have been fooled again! I guess we aren't as smart as our esteemed president not to get fooled again...

As you may (or may not) know, the safety situation reached a critical mass for us last month when two teachers from my school were assaulted up the road. This, combined with CAG parents' assasination, the general rise of crime on the main boulevard we live on and our zone of the city, and other attempted robberies, have led to major anxieties about where we live. Not just Guatemala in general, though that is a big part of it...

Well, our apartment building, while gorgeous, comfortable, and ultra-nice, does not have a guard like other buildings have...we have a handyman who knows the place and people very well, but he is pretty much helpless to stop someone from coming into the building because he has no gun, and no security measures other than to maybe phone us and warn us. This is not good enough for James and me, especially with the way security has been on a downward spiral lately, so we are moving to a new apartment at the end of July.

ANYWAYS, this anxiety/lack of security background had to be said to set the background for this blog post.

The other background to set is that our good friends from school, Matt and Amy (pregnant and engaged!), live next door to us, and our kitchen windows face each other. We can easily see into their apartment, and visa versa. This is usually fun, because we can leave notes, pictures, and wave hello to each other, too! :) But when can it be a problem to look into your neighbor's apartment? ......hmm.......

The first time we were fooled --"shame on us"-- was in December during winter break. We were in our apartment relaxing when I was at the kitchen sink and I noticed that there were scruffy looking guys - definitely not Matt or Amy - rifling through Matt and Amy's things! I knew for a FACT that Matt and Amy were out of the country, and since most of Guatemala was on Christmas vacation, it struck me as the perfect time for burglars to come in and ransack an apartment (remember: we have no guard!).

The man looked up, and I knew that he knew that we were home, and we had seen him. So I immediately panicked, called the doorman (who did not pick up his phone), and I demanded to James that we leave our apartment as soon as possible and then call the police. I didn't even bother putting clothes on; just left in my PJs with the passports. We called our friend and neighbors who lives on the 3rd floor to tell him that someone was robbing the place. Luis (nickname: Wicho - pronounced Wii-cho) is a quite the gun enthusiast, and so he went down to the doorman "Packing with 2 guns, just in case there is action" to check the scene out.

It turned out that no, the place was not being robbed after all. Amy's sister was traveling around Guatemala, and decided to make a surprise stop for a few days to recoup from her travels, and she had brought a few male friends and her boyfriend along too, which is why they looked so disheveled. They weren't ransacking Matt and Amy's things, they were cleaning their own backpacks and souvenirs out! Whew! It was one of the scariest moments in Guate for me because I knew they had seen me, and I thought the 'burglars' would certainly come to kill any witness to their crime! Wicho, James, our doorman, and I all had a good laugh about it afterwards. :)

This Monday we got "fooled again"!

A bit of background for this false alarm: Our apartment in sandwiched between two other apartments: Matt and Amy on one side, in the building, and across the street out of the other side of our place lives an infamous guilty-of-genocide ex-General and Guatemala leader's family. He-who-shall-not-be-named. So, we are constantly looked out of the other side of our apartment at the goings-on of clandestine meetings, bodyguard watching, and creating our own stories of what goes on behind those closed doors...

Monday while James and I were making dinner, we noticed that a hand had partially pulled back the blinds at Matt and Amy's place. We assumed they were wanting to tell us something or were looking at us, so James waved hello. Almost immediately, the hand dropped the blind and went away. No one waved back, which we found suspicious...so a few moments later, the hand is back pulling the blinds, and we wave again. Again, no response. By now, I was already panicking, because a) the hand skin looked dark, not like Matt or Amy's b) no one was waving back c) we called the doorman and he said no one else should have been in their apartment d) Matt and Amy were not picking up their phone e) the hand pulling the blinds back never showed a face, and seemed like the person was trying to hide.

Matt was fun enough to reenact the scene for the blog.

In a 15-20 second time span, I had two theories devised.

Theory 1: Burglars. Matt and Amy weren't home, and someone had broken in, and were checking to see if we had seen them.

Theory 2: Assassins. Someone was using Matt and Amy's place to check across the street where the ex-general's family was, and they were going to use the place for a Book Depository Style killing. Either way, we knew they had spotted us, and I had again entered panic mode.

But because we were wrong about burglars in December (and slightly embarrassed to have caused such a fuss), this time I kept my voice a bit calmer on the phone to Wicho when I explained the situation. He and the doorman promptly came up packing 'heat' (Wicho gave the doorman a gun too, just in case!), and they were quiet as mice checking the situation out from our kitchen. Meanwhile, I did start to panic! In case there was a shootout, I did not want to be there for it, so I basically made James leave with me immediately so they could use our apartment for whatever. I have to give James kudos for remaining super calm in both of these situations.

As we were in the elevator headed to leave the building, Wicho and the doorman went to Matt and Amy's and knocked....imagine Wicho knocking with one hand, loaded and poised gun in the other hand...Amy is 6 months pregnant....

And Matt opened the door! It was him the whole time! His hand just looked dark (hairy, I guess?) and he did not see us waving at him because he was too busy trying to discern if the tortilla lady across the street (yes, next door to the ex-general's family) was still making tortillas at that time. Crisis averted! Again, we were more than happy that there weren't any burglars there and of course we were able to laugh about it afterward, but at the time I was so scared!

But these incidents merely reinforce why I'm glad we are moving apartments. I wouldn't feel so bad knowing that someone is checking IDs and there is an armed guard at the building 24/7, which our current apartment lacks. We move next week, and we are both so excited! I'm sure our doorman and Wicho both think we are the most paranoid gringos around.